Perfection breeds discontent. Read that again. Perfection breeds discontent!
We all do it. I’m guilty too. We live in a society that demands we have luxury cars with all the bells and whistles. We follow fashion trends with name brands and expensive clothing. We will even redecorate our homes to follow the newest decor styles, despite the fact that their is nothing wrong with the items we already own.
You probably shucked out 1000’s of dollars on whatever you already purchased. Then you sell it and hope you can get half of whatever it was you spent, just to turn around and spend it all on something new.
How many people do you think have ended up in financial crisis trying to keep up with the jone’s?
I used to work in a bankruptcy law firm. There were a number of reasons why clients needed to file. Divorce, loss of a job, illness. But one of the main contenders was over spending.
Do we really need all this stuff? If you’ve read any of my other blog post, the answer is no.
But many do because social media and the trend setting powers that be say so.
We all strive to achieve a level of perfection. And then we feel like we aren’t good enough if we don’t achieve the level of perfection we desire.
I wish….I want…..If only……. leads to burnout
Advertisements, commercials, social media, Pinterest, even people we know push and pull us down the dark hole to “what will make us happy”
But are those things really what makes you happy?
Do you go to the gym because the world tells us that we need to achieve a certain body type or meet an ideal weight? Or do you go to the gym because you want to be healthy? Or maybe you’re like me and go to the gym because endorphins really do help me be a happier person, and happy people don’t kill their significant others 😂
Sorry babe 😘
A more recent trend that has taken social media by storm and specifically targets women, is the idea of “strong, independent, boss babes”. Don’t get me wrong, I am all about women’s empowerment and helping women learn that they are capable of anything they set their mind too. I am also a firm believer in equality and that women can do anything a man can do.
But maybe we’ve taken this trend a little too far. I’ve spoke with women who are running themselves ragged trying to do it all. But we don’t have to be such puffed up, Superwomen, that we are too prideful to ask for help.
Ladies, despite what society says:
we 👏🏻 do not 👏🏻 have 👏🏻 to 👏🏻 do 👏🏻 it 👏🏻 all 👏🏻 on 👏🏻 our 👏🏻 own 👏🏻
We also don’t have to be constantly chasing the hustle. There is a beautiful world around us and if we are constantly hustling, we miss out on everything that this beautiful world has to offer. But unfortunately, society says that to get ahead, women have to put in twice the effort. So we do.
We spend so much time and energy chasing the dream that we forget to actually enjoy the beautiful lives we’ve been given.
I’ll let you in on a little secret, you can achieve personal growth and still enjoy your life!
We do not need to consistently be on a journey of self discovery and growth. Yes, growth is amazing! But if we took some time to sit with ourselves and become comfortable in who we are, maybe we wouldn’t need to go find/fix ourselves so often.
I used to pick at myself so bad. You need to be more successful, make more money, be thinner, be well liked, go do fun things and essentially have the best of the world at my finger tips. I finally came to the conclusion after a true journey of growth that I literally hate most of the things I thought were going to better my life.
I am a great teacher and the work I do isn’t just about academics. Winning teaching awards and being recognized doesn’t make me a successful teacher. Having students seek me out because I am a trusted adult in their life and watching them engage with me in class because I’ve taught them that I care deeply for them makes me a successful educator. I don’t buy trendy clothes and try to force myself into smaller sizes anymore. I buy clothes that fit and look good on me and I rock them regardless! I’ve learned that I only enjoy spending time with a whole 5 people, and most of them have been my friends since childhood. Find your people, love them hard. Who cares if anyone else likes you? I also don’t need to go places or do things because it’s the cool thing to do. I enjoy touring gardens and nature trails. I have a small coffee shop I love and I like to spend my free time there reading. I’d prefer to spend my vacations touring historic cities instead of tropical beaches. We spend a majority of our time at home, because it’s my second favorite place to be and that allows us to save money to visit Disney world, which is my favorite place on earth.
One of my favorite authors once wrote “explore the question, do I have enough right this minute”
Sure, you probably need groceries, or some cosmetic product. But do you really need the 5 items sitting in your Amazon cart right now?
Are those items really going to bring you any happiness?
For example, sitting in my Amazon card right now are ice cream koozie. Yes. I said it. I currently have a koozie for my pint of Ben and Jerry’s sitting in my Amazon cart right now! In the moment I put it there, I thought that would be a great idea, because it would help me save myself from wrapping a whole roll of paper towels around it to keep my hand from getting super cold.
And as I sat and evaluated my life this morning I realized I am a crazy person and I DO NOT need a freaking ice cream koozie!
Sometimes, we just need to let moments be simple and vacant. We don’t need to have our social calendars filled. We don’t need to be in the midst of a personal transformation all the time. We don’t need the most expensive items for our homes or toys for our kids.
Chances are if you look around you will see you have more then enough.
And if you stop chasing perfection for just a few minutes, you will see that there is more peace in your soul at this very moment then there will ever be in any of those other ideas.